Lunch
We went to lunch today. He was home from work because it is a federal holiday, Presidents’ Day. He asked me to go. I managed to get my work done. So we went to lunch.
The food in and of itself was typical, average. Nothing I would crave in the future. The conversation started off slow as we searched for common ground. It was a start.
Last night as I was falling asleep while I tried to read a book, he acknowledge my valentine card. I didn’t turn towards him. I couldn’t. I thought I would have a complete melt-down if I saw his eyes. I didn’t want him to know how deeply hurt I felt. I think I thought it would give him a sort of power to know that he’d hurt me. If I wasn’t hurt, I couldn’t be manipulated. He told me he wanted to “recapture and rekindle the fun and the flame we used to have,” too. That’s what I had written in my valentine to him. The card itself read: “With All My Love” (on front cover) – “If there were nothing else but our love for each other I would still have all I need, Happy Valentine’s Day.”
I think it really said the way I feel.
